Battered Shield
by adriennett
Summary: "Why did you make me leader?" "Because you asked." That day he didn't know what he volunteered for. He didn't know what kind of horrible things he would have to suffer to protect his brothers. He didn't know how heavy liability was. He didn't know what kind of monster hid beneath his Sensei's skin... until now. He's a shield that must endure the dark side of leadership. [drabbles]
1. The decision he had made

_Hey there. I started writing this for a suggestion, and I think I kinda like the plot. It's just something about the dark side of leadership. I really hope you'll like it. :)_  
_The story is an overlap between the 2k12 and 2k7 version of TMNT._

_Splinter is _OOC_!_

_(I'm just practicing English writing, please don't judge me for the mistakes!)_

_Rated T for later updates._  
_I do not own the turtles._

* * *

**1. The decision he had made**

* * *

"_Could I be the leader?"_

He shivered as the voice full of hope split through his mind, compelling him to tense his already tight muscles before he would tremble again. He had been only fifteen years old when he had asked a person that question, a person who was standing in front of him—his cold eyes crushed his ribs. An inexperienced fifteen year old kid, who had had no idea what he had volunteered for. Back then the words had sounded honey-glazed in his ears, but after receiving the title, the mask fell down, revealing the truth. Because reality is always different than it first appears. Always. And he, the nineteen years old Hamato Leonardo was already well aware of that. His aching limbs, the bitter taste of his blood in his mouth didn't let the illusion created by reality fool him. Because he was walking on difficult ground.

He was the leader of the family—the responsibility had shifted on his shoulders. He had never thought liability would be such a weight. He had never thought his life would change by a decision. Because it had been his choice. He had posed the question without thinking over the attendant consequences. And now, he truly realized what he had wanted so much for himself. Extra training. Deprivation of liberty. Pain. Injuries. Torturing responsibility. Pain. His brothers' disapproval. And that sharp pair of eyes, which made him choke every time. Always. Even now.

"You're tense. I expect an explanation." That voice, the voice of the master of his own was too much influence on him, his stomach convulsed, he felt the salty sweat slowly rolling down his cheeks. The blood beating in his ears caused headache.

"Lack of sleep," he breathed the reply as determined as he could. The master's gaze pierced his chest harder, his hand gripping the walking stick.

"Are you exhausted? Perhaps this role is too hard for you." He meant it as a statement, though—it sounded like a question. The leader balled his hands into fists, lowering his head. "A leader must always be aware of the consequences of his decisions. Are you aware of that?"

"Yes, _Sensei_," Leonardo responded firmly, as if hatred was hidden in the spoken words. "My job is to protect my team members. Their needs are always more important than mine. I am willing to do anything to protect them from danger and endure the hardship imposed on me in this regard." The master listened patiently, then nodded, but it didn't seem like he was pleased.

"If you really can endure, then I ask the question again. Are you exhausted?"

"No." _I'll protect them from danger… from _you_._

* * *

_What do you think? Want me to continue?_  
_Until next time. :)_

_xx_


	2. The price he has to pay

_Oh my god... I've received 12 reviews for that short and shitty chapter. I just wanna say thank you, thank you, thank you for the feedback. You guys are amazing, really! I know, this is just a bunch of drabbles, but you deserve something longer. I'll try to write longer chapters in the future._  
_Well... where did this idea come from? I don't know, but I like the plot. Will Leo ever break? Follow the story and find out. :)_

_Pls excuse my mistakes!_  
_I do not own TMNT._

* * *

**2. The price he has to pay**

* * *

"_It's an ambush!"_

_It's just a brooding evening run which ends in disaster in the moment when the heavy rain arrives. The blue sky that has stitched only a few stars onto itself disappears—its place is replaced by dark clouds, making sharper the millions of tiny lights of the city. The field of vision suddenly melts into obscurity, knocking sound breaks the calmness before the storm. Rain starts to fall, small drops onto muscular green-skinned warriors' and opponents' (that are dressed in black from head to toe) bodies, making difficult their violent fight. The noise of blades swishing, colliding, water flowing fills a tall building's roof space, the battlefield. The fight initially seems like child's play for the four mutants, but the visual field is getting darker and darker as the number of the enemy gradually increases. Drops of blood fall onto the concrete, which the rain cannot erase. Then more and more blood, oozing from painful wounds._

_The leader of the turtles, with facile movement, stabs two of the line of the enemy. His blades are dirty, but he doesn't care—there's only one aim right before his eyes: to save his brothers who have excellent fighting skills though—they are fighting a losing battle. With learned motion sequence, he sends another opponent to the ground, while his muscles are aching, eyesight's weak, but his chest's fiery. His brain is trying to devise a tactical retreat, and this distracts his attention so much that his leg gets hurt. He gasps and gets rid of the attacker in order to look around. His brothers are tired—their muscles are flaccid, their wounds bleeding. He has to act, now._

"Don, treat their injuries," Leonardo instructed in an explicit tone, showing the way towards the lab with his hand. The purple-clad turtle narrowed his eyes and anxiously looked over his brother.

"And what about you?" he asked with skepticism in his indefinite voice.

"You are the first in command. I'll catch up with you," he received a harsh response. In other situation he would've shoved Leonardo in the lab, but he already knew the leader side of his sibling. You mustn't disagree with him. Mustn't. So he just nodded and disappeared behind the lab door within seconds. The leader took a deep breath, then walked into the living room with stumbling feet where his suddenly heavy body threw itself on the couch. He stared at the blank TV screen for minutes motionless, when his gaze caught something. Swallowing back his pain, he rose to his feet and took something off from the rack. That thing was a DVD with the title _Space Heroes_ on it. His heart leapt in his chest, when he read the name. Lots of Space Heroes DVD lined up on the shelf, old, unused disks. Oh, how he had loved this show! He had never missed any episode. He had looked up to Captain Ryan as if he had been some kind of role model. As a kid, he had wanted to be just like him.

The turtle in blue smiled slightly, then sat down on the edge of the couch, holding the object he had just found. Cascade of memories flooded his mind, beautiful, colorful memories. His hand gently stroked the cover of the DVD as he recalled the afternoons when he had spoken along with the captain. What a stupid… yet beautiful memories they were! They washed away the agony and grief.

"My sons are hurt. What's happened?" From his daydream a grim, determined voice pulled him back to the gray reality. Pain moved back into his tired muscles, his heart began to beat faster though, he remained completely still.

"Am I not your son?" he asked calmly. Although he didn't turn towards him, he felt as his master's posture tensed, his body was surrounded by a lot of rage—his sharp gaze drilled a hole in his shell. Oh, the anger. The filthiest kind of anger.

"You didn't answer my question."

"Neither did you." The leader continued showing his back to his master, but he still saw the rat's face tense. Some kind of invisible force squashed the air, depriving the oxygen of the room—Leonardo had to strain to get air, while hiding this from his master. _My sons_. So Splinter still regarded Don, Mikey and Raph as his sons. It was a sign that he did a good job as a leader. Not perfectly, but tonight he had protected them from danger.

A smile appeared on his face, a flash of spark in his eyes. The spark of strength. Now he knew. He had undertaken the role of the leader to save his brothers. And tonight he had succeeded. Kind of. They were safe, for now. They didn't know what real danger was yet. He did. And he was ready to pay a price… for them.

"Don't worry. _Your sons_ are fine."

* * *

_So...? Let me know what you think. :)_

_xx_


End file.
